Wayne Holland: The Irrational Universe

What You Should Know

... the real scoop ... March 15, 2008


Remember that bullshit artist Glenn Beck, the way he would rant and rave, literally wallow in conspiracy and fear-mongering? One of the schticks he seemed especially proud of was that crap about "what you should know." Forget Glenn Beck. Here is what you really should know:


1. Everybody is full of shit.

2. Everybody is crazy.

3. Nobody gives a fuck about you (except your parents—if you're lucky).

4. Laws are made by people who are scared shitless.

5. Higher education is for people who cannot find their own way.

6. A man of faith never prays (why the fuck would he?).

7. There is no better way in the world to waste your time than by voting for a rich politician who is full of shit, crazy and who doesn't give a fuck about you.

8. If you are like most people, you have probably wasted your entire life listening to (and believing) people who are full of shit, crazy and who do not give a fuck about you.

9. If you live in the West, you have been swimming through a sea of lies, and doing so under the cloudy sky of democracy, which is nothing but the religion of capitalism.

10. No matter what anyone says to you, if you look at them closely, if you carefully scan their aura, you can easily make out what they are really saying, and 99% of the time it is the same thing (there are exceptions to every rule):

"Fuck me, feed me or fuck off."

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Glenn Beck (and, in the interest of complete fairness, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity and all the other myopic conservative morons gushing their negativity on Fox News).

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